Emma Evans

Picture the scene: You've just arrived back from a stressful day at work and are stood in the kitchen trying to decide what to make for tea. You ask your teen what they might like to eat and they answer with a non-committal shrug. This infuriates you and you blurt out, "You make me really frustrated when you won't tell me what you want for tea," (or words to that effect!) and before you know it you're ranting about how ungrateful they are.....etc and the whole situation has exploded! Sound familiar? Why we blame the other person and what actually happens When something happens to us (i.e. a stimulus) it triggers an emotional reaction within us. Have you ever reacted ( negatively) in a situation and wondered why on earth you reacted the way you did? Maybe you haven't been able to understand why you said what you said, or did what you did in a certain situation?  Teenage years can be extremely stressful and one thing's for sure, negative reactions are n

Just try . . .  Just try your best! Don't worry about getting it wrong! If at first you don't succeed, try, try again! How many times have you found yourself saying any of the above to your child? Maybe you take a look at their homework and after assessing its difficulty you decide that they may be able to do it independently and so you encourage them to have a go, to  try it out.  Maybe you're a teacher and find yourself telling your pupils to give a task a go and to just try their best! I'd like you to take a moment and think, how many times have you asked a child to try a task and you've visibly seen the shutters come down? They really don't want to have a go and then you spend the next 5-10 minutes (if you're lucky!) trying to persuade them to have a go! Yeah? Sound familiar? It's normal but you can do better Whether you're a parent, a guardian, a sibling or a teacher we use the word  try  because we want our children to learn som

I can't do this! I'm not good enough! No-one will want to hear what I have to say! I'm useless!  Sound familiar? Every single person reading this post will have experienced what is known as 'Self-Talk.' Put simply, this is the way in which we speak to ourselves in our head . Now, if we speak to ourselves in a positive manner, there isn't an issue. However, the all too familiar voice of the inner critic, the doubter, the voice that judges everything you do, is a voice that I think will be common to most people.  The ' sciencey' bit (bear with me here....) There are m any studies which show the direct connection between the mind and the body and therefore how  o ur thoughts and feelings  directly a ffect: our emotional well-being  our physical health  and promote our mood (whether it be positive or negative) The effects of negative self talk If a person is feeling stressed, slightly or chronically, this is usually when the negative se

Effective communication with your child As a parent to three very different children it has come to my attention that their needs are totally different when it comes to what they actually need from me in our communication. For example, my 7 year old likes to talk endlessly about her day, her friends, her teachers, what she wants to be when she's older, the list goes on but you get my point...! My 10 year old however likes to share information about his favourite YouTuber, favourite television programmes and characters etc. He very rarely goes in to the nitty gritty of the day but still requires the time to communicate with me about what interests him! The eldest, being almost 16, likes to share very little!! (surprise, surprise!)  So how do we make sure that we communicate in the right way for our child? Thankfully,  it's not that difficult and actually boils down to how well we listen! 1. Stop what you're doing!! Have you ever called over a friend or family me